Well…dislocating and breaking my ankle in 3 places wasn’t on my 2023 bingo card but alas, we continue to play the game.
Awfulness aside, after surgery my friend told me this story of a recent core memory of hers that made my day.
To set the scene 🎬
It was a humid New England summer night when Val and Jason went for a short walk after dinner by their apartment in Boston.
They passed a few restaurants and shops closed for the evening, neon signs flickering against the brick facades through the thick haze.
Eventually they stumble upon an empty playground where Val goes:
“Man I really want to swing, when’s the last time you did that?”
Jason, an architect, says:
“Why don’t they build playscapes for adults so it could be socially acceptable for me to be on one without having kids? Just because I’m an adult doesn’t mean I don’t want to play.”
Val replies:
“Well, there’s no one stopping us right now.”
And so they did.
They swang on the swings and kicked their silly little feet like school children because no one was there to tell them to “grow up”.
Listening to Val tell me this story my heart melted. Not just because of how naturally rom com my besties are, but because what Jason said resonated with me to my core.
Just because I’m an adult doesn’t mean I don’t want to play.
It made me think, when do we lose the privilege of play?
Play is what connects us to that child-like wonder within ourselves that makes the world a more optimistic place. A breeding ground for personal growth, happiness and creativity.
A lot of us were parentified and given adult roles and responsibilities at a young age meaning some of us missed out on play in our early lives.
However that doesn’t mean our time for play has passed, and for some of us it’s only just beginning.
Fun fact: Humans need play.
Studies suggest play helps your prefrontal cortex and executive functioning.
Basically that important part of your brain that allows you to regulate your emotions, make decisions and solve problems.
Some psychiatrists even say that play can contribute to human’s curiosity, imagination, and a sense of belonging.
BINGO! — When we get a glimpse at our inner child
we feel seen and we feel understood, like we belong.
That’s why core memories often involve an element of play.
Maybe that’s why movie remakes have been so popular lately?
Sadly, more often than not these remakes are just so hollow.
They show you something you remember, but they don't make you FEEL how you remember.
People making these films simply take a core memory, suffocate it with 2000s puns and then wrap it with obnoxious brand placement that completely rip you out of the moment.
This call back to reality displaces the story immersion, reminding you that you’re not a kid anymore and you should probably be doing laundry with Tide, or buying Mountain Dew or whatever.
With that said, if your dad hears of anyone at Hasbro looking for someone to direct the Nerf movie I’ll gladly accept that honor.
But seriously, there has to be a better way to incorporate core memories into creative media.
I’ll noodle on that more for next time but you know what else I’ve realized about core memories?
Size doesn’t matter
They take many forms.
Core memories can be big life events (getting engaged) or small moments in every day life (swinging on a swing).
Keep me posted on your core memory! I’m going to keep collecting these stories to find similarities that may inform my quest to make something memorable.
So far I know one thing is for sure:
Core memories make you feel something
Val and Jason could have just kept walking home to a lovely evening they likely wouldn’t remember.
But instead they swang.
GAH! MY HEART!! 💖💖💖
I gotta go before I get emotional, who am I kidding, I’m always emotional, and who ever said that had to be a bad thing?
Anyways, I’ll talk to you later.
Byee!
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